Sooooo, I'm home now after a good weekend back in CT so I thought I'd a recap of the weekend and at the end I will give out awards. Yes, that's right, awards. You know you want to stay around and read it.
So, I guess I'll start the recap on Thursday, the day I flew in. The flights weren't too bad. I had a stop in Baltimore b/c Southwest doesn't fly direct to Hartford. Not that big of a deal. I had the OSU women's hockey team on my flight to Baltimore. They were on their way to play Providence. So, I arrived in CT around 4:45ish. My cousin, his wife, and their two kids picked me up and then we headed over to my parents' place in Vernon for dinner to celebrate my b-day. It was a fun night. Afterwards my little sister and I went and saw Ghosttown, which I was really surprised by. I kinda wanted to see it but I wasn't sure how good it would be. It was the only movie playing that my sis would watch so we went. As I told a bunch of people while at the movie theater waiting to buy my ticket, the debate was on and out of nowhere I hear someone yell, "You idiot!" I totally thought he was talking to me but he apologized and said he was talking about Palin. Fun stuff. I would recommend the movie to anyone who's a fan of the office. Same type of awkward humor, sort of like Perrotti trying to talk to a girl, since Ricky Gervais was the star of the movie.
Then came Friday. I was woken up early, 7am, to drive my mom to work so I could use her car. After that I went home & back to sleep. That was nice. After I woke up and ate I headed over to the mall to get my tux. Fun time seeing as I had no idea there were two Men's Warehouses in the buckland mall area. So, I went to the first store, paid for my tux and found out it was at the other one! Went to the other one, tried on the tux, it was a little short so one of the ladies loosened the pants so they were longer. Problem was they were too loose. Of course I didn't say anything b/c I thought I could wear a belt. Later on that for Saturday. Soooo, went back home, then picked up my mom, drove her back home, almost saw two people get in a fight at a traffic light b/c one of them was a jerk while driving, dropped off my mom, took a shower and headed to the rehearsal. This is where the fun begins. Actually it doesn't. The rehearsal was fine, but unfortunately there was a mass going on during it so we spent most of the time whispering or in the main lobby. After we figured everything out we then headed out to the dinner. This is where things got interesting. First off, you couldn't even see where the restaurant was. I was following Koho & Perrotti and they drove past it, turned around and got to it. Then we got inside and that's when the alcohol started coming. And here's when it started getting awkward, like really really awkward. Michelle's(see two LL's) sister invited a friend of the family to be her wedding guest. His name is Justin. He's dating a girl named Amy. Michelle's sister's name is Amy. After the wine started to be drunk Amy decided it was time to tell Justin to dump his gf & marry her. Yup, not awkward at all. Especially not when the rest of the ladies joined in and started to tell him this. I will say he took it like a man, though. Also, I was happy to tell my Star Wars jokes around this time b/c Amy had never seen Star Wars & Justin was a big fan. Lets just say she'll never order only one canoli again! Ha ha. Well, after dinner I headed out to Buffalo Wild Wings all the up near the Airport. A nice little 45 minute drive to hang out with one of my friends from high school and some of his friends. We watched a little bit of the Red Sox game and then my friend and I went to one of the guys' house while the other people went home. I watched until JD f'n Drew hit a 2 run bomb to end the game and any chance of the Angels not sucking and Malone being able to win money with his bet with Rob.
Soooo, Saturday finally arrived. It was time to get ready for the wedding. I woke up, took a shower, started putting on my clothes, put the pants on, realized that if I walked 3 steps my pants came off, took my belt, tried to put it on and realized there were no belt loops on my pants. Big Problem. Luckily for me MW hadn't delivered Malone or Koho's suits yet because they measured wrong. So, I got ready, realized I delted the email with Malone's address(as I was suppose to meet there first), got in the car and drove over. I called Malone and found out the tuxes hadn't been delivered yet, told him my problems, got directions and told him to have the guy wait for me. I got to Malone's place just after the guy from MW got there, had him adjust my pants and I was good to go. Well, we waited around Malone's place for a while and then when Malone's mom came we took some pictures and then left for the wedding. The wedding went pretty well except for when Koho and I tried to walk the roller down and kept on getting stuck in it and then the one time when Koho's phone fell out of his suit. Good Job. But, we made it, everything else went smooth. After the wedding Koho took one for the team, road with me instead of the limo to Michelle's parents' place for some food, time to relax, and oh yeah, Notre Dame football! I mean, more pictures. Finally, after Notre Dame took a 21-7 lead we headed over to the reception for some more pictures! After the pictures were done I found out that ND held onto the game for a 28-21 win, and we were in the reception for the fun to start. The wedding party got to go in a side room for our grand entrance. One bad thing was the girls kept on singing that stupid New Kids song and it got stuck in my head. Ugghhhh. Finally the time came. The wedding party got to come out to Bad to the Bone, while Jim & Michelle were lucky enough to come out to the Brass Bonanza. Probably my favorite wedding song since my roommate Jeremy and his wife came out to Darth Vader's theme! You're lucky Jim(on a side note my friend Seth comes in third with coming out to Hulk Hogan's theme music). Well, then we had to do the first dance. I was lucky enough to dance with Jim's mom with this one. While dancing with her we realized that Perrotti and Malone's siter(also named Michele, but with one L) were basically standing in place so we changed it up and I got to dance with Perrotti. J/k, I got Michele. Then we got to eat. And drink. And drink some more. And some more. Then I stopped while other continued. And they drank some more while I had water so I could drive home safely. After the food was consumed then came the dancing. Well, we were able to dance the night away. I go into more details but I think my awards will cover it.
Then came Sunday. I woke up, ate, showered, waited a bit, then packed, left, dropped off my suit, road on some plains and made it home safely. It's good to be back, but I will say this. I do miss you guys back in CT. The only thing I will ever miss from CT. So, onto the awards:
The award for most awkward moment: This goes to Amy from Friday night. At one point, her and Michelle were telling Justin that he should marry Amy. Well, then Amy put her arm around Justin, then Around Michelle and proceeded to push Justin's head onto her boobs. I swear if Justin was single that weekend wouldn't have been a wide open net, Amy would have scored an own goal for him. How Perrotti wasn't able to kick that in is beyond me.
Best song of the weekend: This is going to Journey's Don't Stop Believing. Perrotti & Rob wouldn't come anywhere near the dance floor whatsoever. Well, a request for this song was put in and by this time of night everyone was feeling pretty well. So, the guys went to the dance floor and we all sang our hearts out to this song. My favorite part was when Rob & I were doing the guitar solos.
Worst song of the weekend: New Kids - The Right Stuff. I blame this on the girls. Or whoever wrote the f'n song.
Best idea that never happened: There was this 17-18 year old girl that came to the wedding and had gigantic who-has and wasn't afraid to show them off. Honestly, who okayed that dress? Couldn't someone had told her to cover those up at all? Anyways she was wearing a red dress. While we were eating and they were playing music I told Koho to go request lady in red, go over to her, tell her he requested this song for her, and then ask her to dance. Yes, it might be a bit cheesy but whatever. I'm just trying to help a brother out.
Best dancer at the wedding: I have to give that up to Ryan Andrew. He was constantly on the dance floor through good song and bad. He's the type of guy you want at your wedding if you want it to be fun.
Worst dancers at the wedding: Rob & Perrotti - First off, it's okay if you don't know how to dance. We're at a wedding, most of the people are drunk, no one really cares if you have two left feet. At least you have two feet. Second off, couldn't one of you guys ask one of the 2-5 single girls there to dance during a slow song? We're not in junior high anymore. They will say yes. Well, unless you're perrotti and the other girl is at least 5'6.
MVP of the weekend: There's actually two. I thought he had it closed up on Saturday but the first one goes to Jimmy Clausen. Second straight week in a row that you set a personal record for most yards in a game. He threw for over 340 yards, 3 td's, no pics. He's putting up a really great season. I can't wait for next year when he wins the Heisman. The second one goes to Eli Manning. When I finally got the airport and got to my terminal I had an hour to kill. By that time the Giants were up 17-3. By the time I left to go on my flight the giants were up 34-6. Eli had an amazing game. He tore apart the Seahawks. I really can't think of another QB who's playing with more confidence than Eli. I'm loving it.
LVP of the weekend: Jim's stepmom. I probably shouldn't write this but when has it ever stopped me? We all know there's a little bit of a grudge going on but did you have to a look on your face like a dentist was pulling your teeth? Really? That's all I'll say about it.
Favorite moment of the weekend: I would have to just say the reception on Saturday night. It was just a lot of fun hanging out with the guys, acting like idiots, having fun dancing whenever anyone would go out there and dance. I'll say it again, I don't miss CT at all, but I do miss my friends from CT.
So, I'll end this very long post by saying this, Jim and Michelle, thanks for the invite to be in the wedding. It was the first time I'd been part of a wedding and it was a lot of fun. There were a couple times it could have gone bad(thank you men's wearhouse) but it didn't. It was a load of fun and I'm glad I was there. I hope you guys have fun on the honeymoon. Now, you guys better visit me or.................I'll come back and paint that state with flames like Sherman through the South!
8 comments:
Roger - another terrific post. You did a great job summing things up at giving awards.
Serious, I thought the wedding and reception were simply magical. Everything was lovely. It was a beautiful day for a great couple.
I will post full thoughts soon - but now I have to go look up Michelle's sister on Facebook.
Roger, that was ok but I am really waiting for Perrotti's recap. No offense, but I think Perrotti does better recaps. I think the MVP should go to him for his speech. When are you coming back to CT?
That was an average recap Roger, but you forgot a lot of stuff. Lucky for you, I have the memory of a hawk so without further adieu here is my recap of the Malone/Dorval Wedding Weekend.
Thursday
-I know Thursday is not part of the weekend, but we went to pick up our tuxes at the Men's Warehouse. Needless to say, the guy that measured us (who conveniently no longer works at that store)had no idea what he was doing because everyone of our tuxes didn't fit. Lucky for me they had a jacket that fit me. Malone and Kohanski were not as lucky. They were told to call on Friday to see if the tuxes would be in. Surprisingly everyone kept their cool.
-After that debacle, we went to Red Robbin. This place has some good burgers and I enjoyed dinner very much.
Friday
-Malone and Kohanski talked to the Men's Warehouse and learned that their tuxes would not be ready. Lucky for them, the crazy guy that worked there would come to their house tomorrow to get them their tuxes. Mind you the church service is at 1.
-I picked Kohanski up and we went to the church for the rehearsal. We sat in the pews waiting for everyone to show up. Some very religious lady wanted us to pray with her in the back. It was awkward and none of us went. She waved us over and everything, I didn't want to be mean, but leave me alone, honestly.
-Malone and Roger then arrived. I was unimpressed with the untucked short-selved shirt Malone was wearing. Then Roger showed up. Untucked shirt, sneakers, who taught you manners?
-We talked in the back about how everything was going to go down the next day. I thought this would have been more planned out, but we sat around debating things for a while. I probably should have payed more attention, but just before this all went down, something unexpected happened. The Priest decided to make fun of me. Talk about being blindsided. I'm probably never going to church again. Later he apologized about his comment, but the damage was done.
-Other things of note from the church portion of the rehearsal include:
Me getting punched in the face by Michelle's mom by accident while getting a hug. She also made fun of me. Kohanski's eyes lighting up when he learned he got to walk down with Michelle's mom. It's unknown if anything else happened. The disappointment in Malone's mom's eyes when she realized she was walking down with Roger. Michelle telling the Priest that Malone's stepmom is evil.
-We then went to dinner at a nice Italian restaurant. Things of note from the restaurant portion of the rehearsal include:
Amy housing wine glass after wine glass and making extremely awkward for Justin. I'd like to say desperation is a stinky cologne. Michelle's mom talking about grandkids. This is scary on numerous levels. Malone getting the guys in the wedding party tall beer glasses with their names on it. It's good to know your name while you are drinking. Overall, it was a lovely dinner and I'm glad I did not get the bill.
Stay tuned for a recap of Saturday and Sunday. This is where things get interesting.
This is what I mean, Perrotti recaps rule! You have me on the edge of my seat for Saturday and Sunday! "You Crybaby"
Hahaha I'm just thinking about how much blog reading Malone is going to have to do to catch up when he returns on October 15th.... if Michelle gives him the new password she'll put on the computer
I must say that I like what Rob wrote better than you two. Also, I wrote it at 10:30 at night on Sunday night after spending the day either in a car, at an airport or on a an airplane. Give me a break. Does anyone know besides Malone if his wife reads the blog and if so if she'll actually read what we wrote about her sister? I'm thinking no. I have one last award:
The award for best plan that I just thought up two days too late - We should have set it up so that a bunch of us texted Malone today "You can do it!" or "Don't be afraid, it won't hurt!" How crazy would he go? Why do I have to think of these soooo late?
Sit down because the recap of Saturday and Sunday is going to be even better.
Saturday
-I arrived at the Malone/Dorval residence at 11. The good news was that Malone and Kohanski finally got their tuxes. I missed the crazy guy from the Men's Warehouse however. This disappointed me, but I think we'll hear from him again.
-Roger was watching College Gameday. He loves that show, but it's pretty boring to me and everyone agreed.
-Someone stated that we should not wear the cuff links. Later I would find out I was the only one that didn't wear them.
-After some pictures in Malone's backyard, we took off for the church. Malone looked nervous. I think at this point there was a 10% chance he wasn't going to do it.
-Malone's mom put the flowers on our tuxes. I was almost positive someone would bleed. It turned out alright. Roger and Kohanski set up the runner and Malone and I went into the back room.
-I don't know what was going on in the front of the church, but there was a sense of nervous anticipation in the back. Malone held strong, but was nervous.
-Malone got Mic'ed up for the wedding. I tried to be on best behavior. I did how point out that there was conveniently a door that we could sneak out of and no one would notice. Malone didn't take the bait.
-I put on Malone's flower on his tux. I was sure this was a bad idea and I don't know why I had to do it. The worse part was they were taking pictures of it. The lady photographer was in shock with how bad I was doing and took over.
-The priest who dissed me was in the back and doing some small talk. He liked to mention how he was doing a lot of funerals lately. This is not something I want to hear about when I'm getting ready for a wedding.
-Finally it was time. Malone didn't bolt. This was probably smart.
-Later I learned that Kohanski and Roger screwed up the runner. At one point Kohanski phone fell out of his pocket. I would like to see the video replay of this.
-Michelle Dorval arrived and Andre gave away the Angel. It takes a man to give away an Angel. Andre had tears in his eyes, but this was a touching moment. Malone you better take care of her dammit.
-Malone looked a little shaking on his feet. I kept an eye on him to make sure he didn't pass out on the hard marble floor. Luckily this didn't happen.
-Being up in the front of the church on a kneeler is not as fun as it looks. However, the ceremony was lovely.
-Malone kissed the bride and there were now two Michelle Malones.
-The receiving line was exciting. Actually, I didn't know anyone. A lot of people were saying Congratulations to us. I don't know why, I didn't get married. I pretty much spent the last 2 years telling Malone it was a bad idea.
-Pictures were taken at the church.
-I got into the limo with the married couple and 4 girls. Normally this would be good, but 3 had boyfriends and one was a mean train wreck.
-At Michelle's house we took more pictures. I believe these came out great, it was a beautiful day and the lake was magnificent.
-I think the highlight of the picture taking was the next door neighbor yelling stuff out of his garage while we were taking pictures.
-The one picture were the girls pretended to drop Malone was a one in a million shot.
-After some pool and a little tv, it was time to go to the reception.
-New Kids on the Block was played in the limo. I was unhappy with this choice.
-More pictures were taken at the reception.
-We got to go in a side room and eat some appetizers and have some drinks. Kohanski ordered rum and coke number 1. I gave up my seat and had to stand the rest of the time. I'm pretty sure the best man should be given a chair.
-We got introduced and it was time for the first dance.
-I got to dance with Malone's sister. Now most would think a perverted comment would follow, but I was happy to dance with her, she's a nice person. We were the only ones doing twirls on the dance floor.
-Malone's mom again got stuck with Roger as a dance partner. I think overall she got hosed the most at this wedding. Needless to say, she b-lined it over to me and we switched partners.
-Now it was time for my speech. I believe Kohanski was the only one to know what I was doing. I thought I would be very nervous speaking in front of everyone, but I wasn't. The speech was a success from my standpoint. People actually laughed and I had a witty comment off the cuff (That's my pen name).
-My speech was a lot better than the maid of honors. Cliches and crying is not a recipe for success.
-At this point, I believe Kohanski was on rum and coke number 5.
-We were finally able to get up and walk around. Rob was dressed for success.
-Dinner was good. The food was solid. There were 2 salads, a pasta boll, sherbet, and the main meal. The chicken was tremendous.
-Maybe it was the beer or the rum and cokes, but at this point things got funnier. Also, things may now be somewhat out of order, I'm unsure why.
-Kohanski got his wish and was able to dance with Michelle's mom. I believe he said it was the best dance of his life. At one point of the evening someone said cougar while Andre was around. This was awkward. Also, I'm pretty sure Kohanski loves Michelle's mom.
-Malone and Michelle cut the cake. Malone was nice, but Michelle Shaqed some cake into Malone's mouth.
-The conga line started. Rob, Roger, myself and Kohanski were sitting on the sideline. Rob and I agreed that dancing is dumb.
-Kohanski after a few more rum and cokes decided to cut in the line behind Michelle's sister. While the line was going away he decided to point and smile in our direction. This will be ingrained in my mind for a while.
-The YMCA was played. While most people say this is a corny song, I disagree, it's timeless. I even got out on the dance floor for this. I don't think there was anything worse than seeing the camera light shine on you when you are on the dance floor. Nothing at the wedding should be videoed after the first hour. That's just my opinion.
-I think was the only one carded at the bar. This didn't really bother me. However, the bad news for Kohanski was that I ordered a beer and a rum and coke, so everytime I went up there she had the beer and rum and coke ready.
-For the second time, someone requested "Don't Stop Believing". That's just a good song and I'm pretty sure I know all the words. So when it was finally played we all went out on the dance floor and sung our hearts out. Roger and Rob even did the air guitar. I think that sealed up Rob's fate of sleeping alone.
-However, the MVP of the wedding besides Malone and Michelle had to be Kohanski. I think he drank a whole bottle of rum. He also talked to some girl from Michelle's work. His line was "how are you" in polish. The girl knows polish. I thought it was a solid line. I watched from nearby and contemplated making a move somewhere myself. I don't know where this would have been, but the thought was there. Needless to say, this ended when I say Kohanski now standing next to an empty chair where the girl used to be. I'm pretty sure that girl should be a thief because she was out without a trace. I don't think I saw her the rest of the evening. Oh well, I can't fault Kohanski for taking a shot.
-As the evening was coming to an end. Michelle's mom was getting some trays together of all the desserts. I got a whole lemon pie and Kohanski got marshmallows and some other stuff.
-Rob, Kohanski, myself and Amy were driven home by Justin. It was nice of him giving us a ride. I think I really felt bad for the kid. The whole weekend he was pressured into trying to get set up with Amy. He handled it well. Rock Band was brought up and Rob talked about how good he was.
-We arrived at the hotel and Amy took off like a bat out of hell. Our hotel had a waterpark. This would have been trouble if we tried to go down some slides. Also, I'm pretty sure Kohanski fell at some point, but that may be undocumented.
-We played 7 card no peak to see how got to sleep by themselves. I won, Kohanski got the honor of sleeping with Rob. At this point Kohanski couldn't deal cards and had no idea what his hand was. I'm pretty sure he still lost.
Sunday
-We met Malone, Michelle and Amy in the hotel lobby. Malone was grinning like an idiot and drinking coffee. Priceless.
-Kohanski who was not at 100% drove us home. This was commendable.
-We dropped off Malone and Michelle at there house. I wondered to myself if this was the last time I'd see him. Time will tell.
-Needless to say, the best part of returning the tuxes. The crazy guy was working and I was happy to see him. Kohanski decided to ask him if he could get a discount because of the whole tux problem. The crazy guys response "No, NO..." and that was it. You really need to be there to understand the tone.
In conclusion, I would like to say it was a fun time, we laughed, cried and no one got hurt. Malone and Michelle make a lovely couple and I wish nothing but the best. Also, I hope they always have a couch for me just in case.
Now, the race is on, who will be the next one to get married? I think I'm going to do "It's Just Lunch" one of these days so all of you are in trouble.
Perrotti, when are you starting your blog? That was the best recap of all time. If I were Malone I would want to come home just to read that.
Roger, I hope you took notes. That's how you do a recap.
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